|      Dating Questionnaire       |

How much do you weigh?

How tall are you?

How old are you?

What color is your hair?
   A. Redhead
   B. Dark Brown Hair
   C. Black hair
   D. Blond hair
   E. Gray hair
   F. Purple punk hair
   G. Let me check the hair color bottle
   H. Salt-and-pepper hair
   I. Receding hair
   J. Hair?  What hair?
   K. Light brown Hair
   L. Dirty Blond

What color are your eyes?
   A. Blue eyes.
   B. Brown eyes.
   C. Green eyes.
   D. Pretty Hazel Eyes.
   E. Black eyes.
   F. Bloodshot eyes.
   G. I don't know, they are always closed.
   H. Cats Eyes!
   I. Light Blue eyes.
   J. Light Green eyes.
   K. Light Brown eyes.
   L. Penetrating Blue eyes.
   M. Penetrating Green eyes.
   N. Penetrating Brown eyes.

What is your ethnic background?
   A. Caucasian.
   B. Black.
   C. Hispanic.
   D. Asian/Pacific.
   E. Middle Eastern.
   F. European.
   G. Other.
   H. No answer.
   I. Vampire
   J. Eurasian
   K. I'm a French Frog
   L. Jewish

What is your educational background?
   A. Did not complete high school.
   B. Completed high school.
   C. Some college or technical training.
   D. 2 year degree.
   E. 4 year degree.
   F. Masters degree.
   G. Doctorate.
   H. I'm a Kindergarten Graduate!

What are your hobbies/interests?
   A. Aviation.
   B. Camping/Hiking.
   C. Skiing Snow/Water.
   D. Scuba diving/Swimming.
   E. Electronics/Computers.
   F. Sailing.
   G. Photography.
   H. Travel.
   I. Movies/Theater.
   J. Art.
   K. Creative Writing.
   L. Dancing.
   M. Sports.
   N. Stereo/Video.
   O. Tennis/Racquetball.
   P. Aerobics/Weight Lifting.
   Q. Women!
   R. Men!
   S. Flirting.
   T. Sex!
   U. Star trek!
   V. Talking...blah blah blah

What best describes your work?
   A. Accounting.
   B. Blue collar.
   C. Business Exec.
   D. Clerical.
   E. Computer field.
   F. Education.
   G. Engineering/Science.
   H. Film/TV/Radio.
   I. Food/Restaurants.
   J. Student.
   K. Law.
   L. Medicine.
   M. Military.
   N. Real Estate.
   O. Sales.
   P. Transportation.
   Q. Unemployed/Other.
   R. Professional Bum.
   S. Skid Row Bum.
   T. Artist/Writer/Actor/Mortician

I use my computer mostly for:
   A. AOL!
   B. Computer games.
   C. Database management.
   D. Programming.
   E. Spreadsheet analysis.
   F. Word processing.
   G. A paperweight.
   H. Looking at nude pictures.
   I. Creating Computer Crimes.
   J. I don't use the computer, it uses me!

I call AOL:
   A. Daily
   B. Several times a week
   C. Weekly
   D. Weekdays
   E. Weekends
   F. Rarely

Are you currently attached or single?
   A. I'm single and loving it.
   B. I'm looking for a long-term relationship.
   C. I'm looking for a lover.
   D. I'm attached and happy.
   E. I'm attached but still looking.
   F. Ask me later.
   G. I'm Single.
   H. I'm Separated.
   I. I'm Separated and ready for action!
   J. I'm Divorced.
   K. I'm Divorced and ready to play again!
   L. I'm Married and ???
   M. I'm Married and can't take it anymore!
   N. I'm not married but do have a significant other.

Describe your looks....
   A. I'm a one-two punch KNOCK OUT!!!
   B. Sure make many a head turn.
   C. Can fool you with a little effort.
   D. OK.... but what a personality.
   E. Give me the garbage bag...I wanna be unknown forever.
   F. Bring your garbage bag too, in case I take off mine.
   G. I'm so Ugly I make the Onions cry!
   H. Meet me and find out for yourself!

Do you have children, and if so, how many live with you?
   A. No Kids. Not now, not ever.
   B. Kids yes but not with me.
   C. Kids yes and 1 with me.
   D. Kids yes and 2 with me.
   E. Kids yes and 3 with me.
   F. Kids yes and countless with me!!!!
   G. Kids yes but I don't know where they are.
   H. Kids maybe -- I just don't know yet.
   I. No Kids, but someday I'd like some.

What are your views on smoking?
   A. I smoke cigarettes.
   B. I don't smoke and tolerate smokers.
   C. I don't smoke and do not tolerate smokers.
   D. I don't smoke cigarettes but smoke pot.
   E. I'm a chimney I'll smoke anything.
   F. The only smoking I do is in the bedroom!

What is your favorite food type?
   A. Good old American food.
   B. Chinese/Oriental.
   C. Greek.
   D. French.
   E. Italian.
   F. Mexican.
   G. Pizza!!!
   H. Seafood.
   I. Vegetarian.
   J. TV dinners.
   K. I'll eat anything that doesn't bite back.
   L. Junk Food.
   M. Any Restaurant Food!
   O. All Types!  Will you take me to dinner?
   P. Blood
   Q. Hamburgers & French Fries!

How do you feel about drug use?
   A. Drugs should be taken only when ill.
   B. Recreational drug use is OK.
   C. Drugs are OK for others but not for me.
   D. I plead the fifth.
   E. Call out the Narcotics Squad, I'm pure dope!

My drinking habits are:
   A. I drink like a fish and am rarely sober.
   B. I drink as much as my wallet allows.
   C. I'm a light social drinker.
   D. I don't drink but its OK for others.
   E. I wish we still had prohibition.

Are you.......
   A. A night owl.
   B. A day person.
   C. A night person forced into a day person's hours.
   D. I'm a Vampire, I'll only come out at night!
   E. I'm an insomniac!

What would you expect in a first date?
   A. I'm not available for a date.
   B. A handshake.
   C. A kiss at the door.
   D. Mild cuddling.
   E. Heavy pawing!!!!
   F. Your place or mine.
   G. Ooooooooooooo pure joy!
   H. Everything Baby, Everything.
   I. I expect in return only what I can give.

What style of clothes do you wear?
   A. Casual.
   B. Very dressy.
   C. Anything clean.
   D. Fit the occasion.
   E. Preppy.
   F. I wish it was Halloween all year round.
   G. I wear ONLY the latest fashions!  Puh-Lease!
   H. I'm usually Naked.
   I. A Cape!
   J. I heard their having a blue light clothes special at Kmart...

What would be your idea of a great escape?
   A. Beach strolling in the Riviera.
   B. A romantic dinner in Paris.
   C. Sailing in the Caribbean.
   D. Toasting a Japanese sunrise.
   E. A weekend in Las Vegas or Monte Carlo.
   F. A trip to the wine country.
   G. A ride in the space shuttle.
   H. Dog sledding in Alaska.
   I. Sleeping on the local nude beach.
   J. A trip to the Local Bar!
   K. A trip to Safeway.
   L. Going Back in time.
   M. Going Forward in time.
   N. Going to sleep!
   O. Going to Australia!

Your favorite season.....
   A. Summer.
   B. Winter.
   C. Fall.
   D. Spring.
   E. Football.
   F. Baseball.
   G. The Hockey Season!
   H. The Basketball Season.
   I. Any Season, has long as I can have my Ice Cream.
   J. The Christmas Season
   K. SHOPPING SEASON!!!!!!!!!!!!

How would you categorize your political viewpoint?
   A. Conservative.
   B. Liberal.
   C. Leftist.
   D. Feminist.
   E. Leftover Feminist.
   F. People change, so do I -- what ever is convenient.
   G. Politics Be Damned!
   H. Who Cares!
   I. I'm a ditto-head!
   J. What's a ditto-head?

What is your Astrological Sign?
   A. Aquarius.
   B. Pisces.
   C. Aries.
   D. Gemini.
   E. Virgo.
   F. Capricorn.
   G. Cancer.
   H. Leo.
   I. Sagittarius.
   J. Libra.
   K. Scorpio.
   L. Taurus.
   M. Neon.
   N. One way.
   O. Yield.

What kind of music do you like?
   A. Classical.
   B. Jazz.
   C. Real Rock. (Eric Clapton, Jimmy Hendrix, Rolling Stones.)
   D. Bimbo Rock. (Madonna, Prince, etc.)
   E. Soul.
   F. Heavy Metal.
   G. New Wave. (Yuppie Jazz).
   H. Country Western. (I can even write them songs!!!)
   I. Reggae.
   J. I don't like music.
   K. Death Rock!
   L. Easy Listening.
   M. I enjoy all types of Music!
   N. I am a Deadhead!
   O. I like all types of music...EXCEPT COUNTRY!
   P. I like all types of music...EXCEPT ROCK!

How would you describe your personality?
   A. Intelligent/Cautious.
   B. Romantic/Optimistic.
   C. Cheerful/Realistic.
   D. Quiet/Serene.
   E. Naive/Sheltered.
   F. Daring/Wild.
   G. Bleak/Moody.
   H. I'm plain old stupid!
   I. I have no personality, But what a body!
   J. Cynical/Bitchy!
   K. I'm a French Frog, what else can I say?
   L. I'm a lover, Mainly, Mostly, and Always.

Is religion a part of your life?
   A. I'm deeply religious.
   B. I'm moderately religious.
   C. I pray when I'm in trouble.
   D. Religion is not a part of my life at all.
   E. I'm an atheist.
   F. I'm not sure.

Describe your sense of humor.
   A. I always wanted to be a stand up comedian.
   B. I'm quite funny in social settings.
   C. I like a good joke or a funny story.
   D. I'm not funny at all and I don't like to laugh.
   E. I am prone to MULTIPLE SARCASM.
   F. Your asking *ME*???

Did you like answering these questions?
   A. Yea, I love them gimme more!!!!
   B. I'm like Mikey I'll answer anything.
   C. It's OK but it takes a long time though.
   D. I hated it!
   E. You cut into my chat time with so many darn questions!
   F. To know me, is to love me, ask away anytime!

*** Essay Questionnaire ***

These questions start where the multiple-choice questionnaire leaves off.
What are you looking for?   A Mate?  Romance?  Fun?  Computer software?  A
quick fling? 

Are you currently involved in a meaningful relationship?

If meeting a new person is a possibility for you, what type of person do you
think you would be attracted to?
What type of person would you definitely avoid?

How long has it been since your last significant relationship?  Describe that
If not how many people are you dating now?

What makes a relationship not work for you?

Do you think its possible to fall in love over a computer?
Have you ever?

Have you ever had an affair in a relationship and gotten away with it?

What kind of work do you?  Do you like your work?

How much do you earn at work?  Do you have other sources of income?

What is your net worth?  Do you have any significant debts (credit card or

Do you live in a house, condo, or apartment?  Do you own it or rent it?
Describe your home.

Do you own a car?  More than one?  Describe it (or them).

Do you have any philosophical views that you would like to share?

When on a date, who do you think should fork out the dough for the primo
eats, and all of the other evening activities?

What are your favorite TV Shows?  How about your all time
favorite movies?

What is a common complaint and a positive comment people whom have dated you
have said?

Describe your childhood.

Describe your family, your pets, and something else that makes you smile!
What makes you the person that you are today?

What is your biggest fear about a life long relationship?

Is there an important question I neglected to ask?  Is there anything else
you'd like to ask me?